Trust first

It irks me (and that’s probably underplaying it) when people throw out the line, “You need to earn my trust!” Sorry, mate. I actually don’t.

Trust is like common courtesy. Something everyone deserves but it is at risk of becoming disappointingly UN-common.

I do believe most people start from a basic level of trust, otherwise we couldn’t function within a society. But an incredibly self-protective statement such as “You need to earn my trust” just creates a barrier of entry for anyone trying to interact with you!

Why create more speed bumps to navigate? Just skip it!

I remember a TV show forever ago where a guy walked straight into a café and said, “I’m new in town and will be coming in every day for a coffee. How about we skip straight to the part where you say, “The usual, Bob?” like I’m a regular?”

Why can’t relationships be like that? Sure, there's some nuance required, but why overcomplicate something that is exceedingly simple? I was always in complete awe of my children when they rolled up to a kid they'd never met on the playground and said, "Wanna be friends?"

Go first. Be brave. Be the vulnerable one who starts a genuine interaction. Skip the nervous dance and treat someone like a friend straight away! If we want to be trusted, we need to go first!

Of course, there’s risk involved. That’s why it’s called being brave. Der.

Like any relationship, someone needs to lean in first. Extend the hand. Make eye contact. Offer help. Even ask for help! Obviously, it may be inappropriate to ask for someone's hand in marriage on the first date, so be sure to read the room ;)

I want to be the leader who risks it first. That opens up and shares. That trusts and expects to be trusted. That lets someone know, by my own actions, that they too can be open and honest.

Now, you go.